18.

/ Februari 21, 2015 /
Being 18 is weird.

I have no idea how can I come up with that conclusion, because once I state it in front of people in their 40s, they will look at me like, "No. 18 is fun. 18 isn't weird."

Because how can you call it fun being 18 when you wanted to stay at your bed all day like 70, when you wanted to call your stupid doodles as a piece of 'art' like you were 5. When everyone else expected you to act like 37 but treat you like you're 12. How can you call it fun when you don't want to write your essay and just pouring idiotic phrases and make it 5 pages long on your college assignment like you're still in the middle school, and how can you expect an 18 being wise and already thinking about their future and what they wanna do when only feel like yesterday they still ask if they can go to bathroom like they're still in the high school?

And they think you fall in love like you are 23. Fall hard.

18 is just a matter of a number. You can see me being 18 and act like 7 on some days, and maybe 28 on the other days. It's like being 17 or 19. There are barely any differences. You think being 18 is fun but is it only me that think being 6 is more fun?

But I guess, whatever it is, 18 is still just a number and I still go figure out what's going on.

Wow.

/ Desember 07, 2014 /
It surprises me now how can someone be so winner and how the other be so loser.

Sadly, I'm the second.

Surprising, right? At least, buat aku. How can someone be so simple and saying that he'll fly to Europe just like he'll eat salad for breakfast. Like "nothing's big!" Gundulmu, itu pencapaian gede banget!

Collage I Made Myself.

/ /

Not exactly collage. But, I dunno how to call this?
Can you help me define?

Pink
Book & Reading




















Dessert
Fruits




















Ulzzang
Rain



















Typography
Kikwang







Staring

/ Desember 06, 2014 /
You caught me staring,
but I caught you staring back.


And then you smiled.

--

Dengan topi snapback terbalik dan gitar tergantung di punggung, dia menengadah menatap langit. Menyaksikan kembang api dan tersenyum.

Itu, sih, yang orang lain lihat. Hal lain lagi yang mereka lihat adalah dia memakai kaus berwarna hitam dengan gambar jangkar putih di bagian depannya, dengan jaket abu-abu. Memakai celana jeans berwarna gelap yang sedikit lusuh, dan sneaker vans berwarna hitam juga. Hal lain yang mereka lihat adalah dia tersenyum--lebar. Dengan mata seperti anak kecil yang melihat tipuan sulap untuk pertama kali.

Itupun, kalau orang lain sempat lihat.

Yang aku lihat--bukan bermaksud sebagai stalker yang kurang kerjaan--dia berdiri disana dengan pandangan puas. Wajahnya senang. Kalau kau lihat dia tersenyum lebar saat mendengar ujian trigonometri dibatalkan, itu bukan wajah senang seperti itu. Kalau kau lihat matanya bersinar saat dia mendapati orang lain mau mendengar musiknya setelah dipaksa-paksa, itu juga bukan mata bersinar seperti itu. Aku berdiri lima puluh meter darinya dan aku seperti mendengar isi suaranya--dan dia bahkan tidak sadar ada aku.

Tidak apa-apa. Toh, dia hanya bakal mengingat aku cuma gadis yang sekelas dengannya di satu mata pelajaran. Dia tidak akan mengingat aku sebagai gadis cantik setengah mati yang ditemuinya di sekolah atau gadis jenius yang bisa mengira-ngira kecepatan roket untuk bisa mencapai Uranus.

Lihat dia, sendirian. Sambil memasukkan tangannya ke saku celana dan terus menengadah. Kembang api meledak-ledak dan ia terpesona. Mungkin, dia suka kembang api seperti aku suka pada kata-kata. Tak apa, kembang api sebesar ini dan selama ini hanya ada sekali setahun, biarkan dia menikmatinya walau senang di wajahnya juga terlalu berlebihan. Berlebihan, karena yang menggambarkannya aku. Tak ada yang membuat aku bisa menampakkan wajah gembira seperti itu, sepertinya.

Dengan satu gerakan dia menolehkan kepalanya.

Aku.

Menatap.

Dia melihatku.

Aku?

Aku melihatnya--dan dia melihatku? Matanya membesar, alisnya naik. Kembang api meledak-ledak.
Mungkin, mungkin, dia mengingatku juga.

Lalu dia tersenyum.


end.



a/n: Well. Hai.
Untuk kesekian kalinya menyesal karena jarang posting. Maklum laaah mahasiswa, harus lebih sibuk dari dosennya.. :p
Walaupun bukan fanfiction (karena enggak menyertakan satupun tokoh, kejadian, atau latar belakang cerita) yang berhubungan dengan idola (jijik banget sih kata idola tuh sebenernya kaya "Idola gue banget Raffi Ahmad sama Gigi.. bwehh) dan ini adalah fiction standar yang ga sempet diperhitungkan jumlah kata, genre dsb.
Udalah. Pusing. Byeee~ Ga jelas banget kan.

List of things I am not and I do not

/ Juli 29, 2014 /
- I am not a morning person
- I am not a funny little girl (not anymore)
- I am (hopefully) not a weak person
- nor I am a strong one neither
- I am not tall
- I am not an easy going and friendly kind of person
- I don't like cheese
- and I don't like cheesy stuffs/person
- I am not a socmed person (holyyyyy crap)
- I am not going crazy over Justin Bieber and Zac Efron (not anymore)
- More like I don't like those kind of faces, I adore Andrew Garfield kind of face
- I don't like wearing black
- I don't like denim jacket
- I am not a kind of person who makes the first move
- I don't speak English fluently
- or Spanish or French or Korean
- I don't really share stuffs online unless my writing
- I don't like 30 degrees and up 
- but at the same time I am not going to survive 18 degrees and below
- I don't do math well 
- I never taste alcohol and I don't like people who smoke
- I don't have an instagram account (frankly I was born in wrong century)
- because I don't like people viewing my pics
- I am not great at making diy things 
- I don't like cramp at my tummy when I got my period (more like, who does?)
- I don't think I am normal
- but it doesn't mean I think I am weird 

YOU KNOW, I CAN WRITE MORE.
BUT TSK TSK  
 
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